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Transitioning into Life as a Stay at Home Wife

on April 30, 2012 by Jami Balmet 28 comments

Last week I shared how God’s timing is not usually our timing and how we are finally moving close to our family again.

We are moving at a PERFECT time, however the biggest concern at first was that I just started a new, full time, fantastic job.

Our plan was that I would work full time until 8 or 9 months pregnant with our first child, and then I would be home full time, hopefully forever.

I have dreamed and longed for the day that I would stay at home full time.

I have explored MANY different ideas of working from home but none of them were viable enough for me to quit my full time job, especially one that I actually do love (I work at a Christian college) while trying to save for a home and pay off our student loans.

Transitioning into life as a stay at home wife

So I have worked full time and have been SO thankful that I had a full time job and that we could pay our bills, and I realize how fortunate and blessed we have been. The Lord is good.

But with this move coming up, I am obviously losing my job. We are moving 6 hours away with no colleges in the area, let alone Christian colleges. My experience and knowledge lies in working at a college. I have worked at two different Christian colleges for nearly 4 years. So I began contemplating what possible job I could get. I assumed I would be searching for a job for months trying to get something…secretary somewhere maybe??

As we stressed about this and how I would find a job, my sweet husband approached me and told me that he doesn’t want me working. I have made some money online and have planned to expand this and will be home once we have kids anyway (which will hopefully be soon), so very firmly and gently he said he does not want me working.

I battled this at first…But we NEED the money! And won’t it feel like I’m wasting my time? If I can help contribute to our family and save for a house, shouldn’t I?? And for the last 3 years of our marriage, that answer was YES. For us, me working the past 3 years has been the right answer.

But now? Now I am embarking on a new journey. Now I am finally launching a design business this summer. Now I am going to be able to do all those things I haven’t had time for. Now I can fully embrace the role God designed me for and what delights my heart, being a full time homemaker.

I am scared at the idea and beyond excited for it. It is taking ALL of my energy to try and stay focused at my full time job for the next two weeks while dreaming of what is just around the corner.

I have always mentioned to my husband in passing that I would love to stay home full time before kids…but the answer has always been the same. We can’t. We can’t afford it yet.

But now? God has blessed my husband with a promotion. And God has blessed me with the ability to work from home.

The Lord is so good and we are excited for this next step in our marriage and our life. 2 months ago we could have never anticipated this coming up…but with a simple phone call…our world was turned upside down and the Lord is blessing us and making plans for us that we could never have imagined.

My heart is so full this week as I marvel at all that God has given to us. Praise be to HIM

The Lord is my strength and my song, and he has become my salvation; this is my God, and I will praise him,  my father’s God, and I will exalt him. ~ Exodus 15:2

Update: The Lord is so good! About two weeks after posting this article, we found out we were pregnant with our first baby!! A couple months later, we found out we were having twins! ALL in his perfect timing 🙂

Get instant free access to my Finding Joy in Your Home video course.

  • Do you want to discover more joy, peace, & tranquility within your home?
  • Do you feel overwhelmed and like your house is out of control?
  • Join my free course and learn the essential habits for Christian homemakers
  1. That is so exciting Jami! I have only stayed at home since I had my son, but it is such a blessing to be home! Good luck with all your new adventures!!

  2. So happy for you, Jami!! What an exciting time. Good luck with the next 2 weeks at your job and the move! Looking forward to seeing what the Lord teaches you through this transition 🙂

  3. Congratulations on this new and exciting chapter. We made the transition almost 6 yrs ago because I felt God calling me to stay home with our son. On paper it should have never worked! But PRAISE THE LORD, He always provides all of our needs! Praying for God’s richest blessings on you and your husband as you follow Him one step at a time.

  4. Jami I am so encouraged by this post and CONGRATULATIONS! What a blessing. I love hearing how the Lord is leading you here, as your desire and plan (to work up until your first baby is due) is my plan as well. However, I cannot see it happening! My husband is getting into real estate and we are prayfully moving forward and hoping this is the way the Lord will provide for us so that I can stay at home full time. It was so exciting to read about your story and I am so excited FOR you and your family!

    Nicole at Working Kansas Homemaker

    • Hi Nicole, thank you!!! Me staying home has been our goal for 3 years now! Every decision we make about jobs and finances revolves around this. So it was a matter of if it was a matter of when! And sometimes we were not sure if it would financially work out! So even if you can’t stay at right away at least at some point you can 🙂 I am praying for you! I know this can be a really hard situation….praying!!!

  5. Hi! i just wanted to say hello and introduce myself. I am a stay-at-home wife as well, and we don’t have any (living) children yet. It is rare to find someone else who doesn’t have kids and is also staying home, so welcome to this very small group! It’s wonderful and amazing, and you’ll find out that you can contribute just as much to the family by staying home, too!

    • Hi Amanda, Thank you for stopping by! I love your blog, I can’t wait to read more!! I know…I feel like people are going to think I’m lazy or something lol but I already have SO much planned it’s going to take up all my time! So glad to meet a fellow Stay at Home Wife!!

  6. James, I am beyond excited for you in this new step:) This is a step of faith. But, God will provide. Commit your ways to Him and He will direct your steps.

  7. My heart is full for you. How good is God. I am so glad that you get to do what makes you happy…you serve your household with your whole heart and love them because you know it honors the Lord. Reading your post gave me a renewed sense of just how blessed I am to be able to stay at home with my kids and take care of my household. In this day and age, it is not always possible for some mommies. Thank you for this.

    • Thank you Tiffany!! God is SO good! I feel very blessed that I get to stay home and thank the Lord that I will be able to stay home when we have kids. I know that many women who desire to stay home with their kids and it breaks their heart! I’m so thankful for how he arranges these things 🙂

  8. my husband just received and accepted a job offer that will allow me to stay at home! we’re looking for a new place (as the job is a couple of states over) and he starts in two weeks!… I’m SO excited as it’s been really tough working full-time in an office this past year when I really just wanted to be a stay at home wife (and hopefully sometime soon, a stay at home mom) 🙂

  9. That is awesome! My husband and I are praying that he gets this job he recently applied for. We figured out that with daycare expenses and everything, it may just be better for me to stay at home. Then, I can also get my Masters degree completed sooner. I hope that we are blessed like you have been. If God wants this for us, I know we will be.

  10. Thank you so much for your encouraging words about being a stay at home wife, really blessed my heart to read this post! It’s my greatest desire to be a diligent stay at home wife and to quit my current fulltime job but unfortunately the young wives in our church are strongly encouraged to have fulltime jobs and also to have a successful career and I’m getting looked down on when I mention what it is really on my heart concerning this important topic. My lovely hubs supports me though, he’s just amazing! Anyways, the Lord is with me and knows my deepest desires and puts people like you in my life who have the courage and boldness to write about being in God’s perfect will for a wife and mother to be a good homemaker.

    Hope it is all going well with your beautiful twins?
    Thank you so much for that, totally made my day.
    Sarah from New Zealand <3

  11. I just found your blog, and absolutely love it! I became a house wife (or as I like to call it “domestic engineer) almost 2 years ago, and it was the best decision we ever made. Sure we don’t have as much money, but my husband and I are healthier and happier then ever before. I love the feeling of being able to support my husband on the home front so that he can focus 100% on providing for our family. No kids yet, but hoping to start trying in the near future. God definitely has met all of our needs!